A story of two friends...

A story tells that two friends were walking through the desert. During some point of the journey, they had an argument, and one friend slapped the other one in the face.

The one who got slapped was hurt, but without saying anything, wrote in the sand:
TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SLAPPED ME ON THE FACE .

They kept on walking until they found an oasis, where they decided to take a bath. The one who had been slapped got stuck in the mire and started drowning, but the friend saved him.

After he recovered from the near drowning, he wrote on a stone:
TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SAVED MY LIFE.

The friend who had slapped and saved his best friend asked him, "After I hurt you, you wrote in the sand and now, you write on a stone, why?"

The other friend replied "When someone hurts us we should write it down in sand where winds of forgiveness can erase it away.. But, when someone does something good for us, we must engrave it in stone where no wind can ever erase it."

LEARN TO WRITE YOUR HURTS IN THE SAND AND TO CARVE YOUR BENEFITS ON STONE!!!

They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but then an entire life to forget them.

Do not value the THINGS you have in your life. Value WHO you have in your life!

Management Stories (Humour)

DISCLAIMER: The stories are meant for self enlightenment and not to be taken as reflection of any event or work environment. Any resemblance is truly co-incidental & unintentional.


STORY #1
There’s an old story about a man searching for his lost keys under the light on a dark night, even though they were last seen elsewhere. When a passerby asks why he continues to search in the wrong spot, the man replies, “Because the light’s better over here.”

Too often, companies search within their own sphere of knowledge rather than seeking solutions wherever they may be found.


STORY #2
It’s a fine sunny day in the forest and a lion is sitting outside his cave, lying lazily in the sun. Along comes a fox, out on a walk.

Fox: “Do you know the time, because my watch is broken”
Lion: “Oh, I can easily fix the watch for you”

Fox: “Hmm… But it’s a very complicated mechanism, and your big claws will only destroy it even more”
Lion: “Oh no, give it to me, and it will be fixed”

Fox: “That’s ridiculous! Any fool knows that lazy lions with great claws cannot fix complicated watches”
Lion: “Sure they do, give it to me and it will be fixed”

The lion disappears into his cave, and after a while he comes back with the watch which is running perfectly. The fox is impressed, and the lion continues to lie lazily in the sun, looking very pleased with himself.
Soon a wolf comes along and stops to watch the lazy lion in the sun.

Wolf: “Can I come and watch TV tonight with you, because mine is broken”
Lion: “Oh, I can easily fix your TV for you”

Wolf: “You don’t expect me to believe such rubbish, do you? There is no way that a lazy lion with big claws can fix a complicated TV”
Lion: “No problem. Do you want to try it?”

The lion goes into his cave, and after a while comes back with a perfectly fixed TV. The wolf goes away happily and amazed.

Scene: Inside the lion’s cave. In one corner are half a dozen small and intelligent looking rabbits that are busily doing very complicated work with very detailed instruments. In the other corner lies a huge lion looking very pleased with himself.

Moral: If You Want To Know Why A Manager Is Famous; Look At The Work Of His Subordinates.

Management lesson in the context of the working world: If you want to know why someone undeserved is promoted; look at the work of his subordinates.


STORY # 3
It’s a fine sunny day in the forest and a rabbit is sitting outside his burrow, tippy-tapping on his typewriter. Along comes a fox, out for a walk.

Fox: “What are you working on?”
Rabbit: “My thesis.”

Fox: “Hmm… What is it about?”
Rabbit: “Oh, I’m writing about how rabbits eat foxes.”

Fox: “That’s ridiculous! Any fool knows that rabbits don’t eat foxes!”
Rabbit: “Come with me and I’ll show you!”

They both disappear into the rabbit’s burrow. After few minutes, gnawing on a fox bone, the rabbit returns to his typewriter and resumes typing. Soon a wolf comes along and stops to watch the hardworking rabbit.

Wolf: “What’s that you are writing?”
Rabbit: “I’m doing a thesis on how rabbits eat wolves.”

Wolf: “you don’t expect to get such rubbish published, do you?”
Rabbit: “No problem. Do you want to see why?”

The rabbit and the wolf go into the burrow and again the rabbit returns by himself, after a few minutes, and goes back to typing.

Finally a bear comes along and asks, “What are you doing?
Rabbit: “I’m doing a thesis on how rabbits eat bears.”

Bear: “Well that’s absurd!”
Rabbit: “Come into my home and I’ll show you”

Scene: As they enter the burrow, the rabbit introduces the bear to the lion.

Moral: It Doesn’t Matter How Silly you’re Thesis Topic Is; What Matters Is Whom You Have as a Supervisor.

Management Lesson In the context of the working world: It Doesn’t Matter How Bad Your Performance Is; What Matters Is Whether Your Boss Likes You or Not.

Life and Chaos

It becomes a debatable venture to find the meaning, and justify the existence of CHAOS. But the fact is that everything in life, other than chaos, is uncertain, random and mystical.

We feel that being pedantic and apposite is the key to success, being systematic makes life easy and being straightforward makes things simple. But surprisingly, chaos is the most systematic...

It is most flexible – no rules, no regulations, no sets, no targets. An amassed space focused only on self and not on things; Chaos is a key to originality. It opens floodgates to imagination and adds character to persona. Chaos is well defined and helps to draw inspirations from varied sources. It is fun; it fills empty spaces, and adds spunk...

Some go to the extent of saying that Chaos is what goes in my head as well. And I will tend to agree, because I believe that Chaos is all about my creative side. Basically my blogs and posts get rejuvenated by my daily encounters and accidents with life, which again is chaos...

We all need doses of muddle and chaos and disarray to add colour to our lives, since spilling colour on canvas makes more interesting and colourful paintings than regular point to point additions by the brush...

Chaos Rules... Hope you all appreciate it!!!

Pressure at Work !!!

Here is a beautiful story, which I received through a forwarded email. I liked it so much because I could relate to it, and understand what I am missing. Each of us have something to pick from this.
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I hired a plumber to help me restore an old farmhouse, and after he had just finished a rough first day on the job, a flat tyre made him lose an hour of work, his electric drill quit and his ancient one-ton truck refused to start. While I drove him home, he sat in stony silence. On arriving he invited me in to meet his family. As we walked towards the front door, he paused briefly at a tree, touching the tips of the tree. When opening the door he underwent an amazing transformation.

His tanned face was wreathed in smiles and he hugged his two small children and gave them a kiss. Afterward he walked me to the car. We passed the tree and my curiosity got the better of me. I asked him about what I had seen him do earlier.

Oh, that's my trouble tree," he replied. "I know I can't help having troubles on the job, but one thing's for sure, those troubles don't belong in the house with my wife and the children. So I just hang them up on the tree every night when I come home and then in the morning I pick them up again. "Funny thing is," he smiled, "when I come out in the morning to pick them up, there aren't nearly as many as I remember hanging up the night before."

Rise - The Road Ahead Lies Within

This is a poem I wrote (taking inspiration from some other poems) for an internal competition, and I got a consolation prize for this...
Need to apply this in my life now...

If you gaze around, there's nothing to keep you behind...

Don’ be anxious, un-limitation and way ahead lies in your mind...

Conventional thinking needs a punt in the face,

It's okay to fail now, yes, it's no disgrace...

Break all those shackles put by those around you,

Explore all the alternatives, because that's how you grow.

With the no-limit spirit, Unlimit yourself,

Unthink your past, and Unprogram yourself...

Pull out the stops now, go right ahead...

Put your heart and soul into what you're doing today,

Feel the energy in you, as limits fall away...

Be a black ocean, leaping and wide,

Roaring and soaring, bear in the tide,

Keep a positive thinking in gloom,

And the joyous road to success will bloom,

Leaving behind nights of terror and fear,

Into a daybreak that's wondrously clear...

You can Rise! Rise! Rise!

It's great till it lasts... But what next??

A day before my 25th birthday, I am penning this post down. Probably it was time for a quarter-life realization.

Picking up cues from the feelings I had while writing a few earlier posts, a silly question coming to my mind... What happens when u lose faith?? It can be faith in a relationship, faith in friendship, faith in someone, or faith in self...

Howsoever stupid it might seem on reading, but sometimes it does happen. I will describe what happened to me when I lost faith in a relationship...

NOTHING. Yes, Nothing happened. I didn’t even make out that I have lost something. I never felt the pain. Slight exasperation for few weeks, but that was all. I never noticed anything else. Even now I don’t feel any pain or sadness. But off late (after over one and half long years) I realize what I have lost. I lost most of my emotions and feelings along with it. I don’t feel anything now days. Happiness, Sorrow, Anger, Fear… They’re all superficial... Something inside stopped working.

Today at this instant I feel that it may change in due course of time. I may come back to my real self. But when frustration creeps in, I feel that that I won’t mind even if I don’t come back to my real self.

As it is, most people do not notice this change. For them, I am still the same. Thankfully, they can't look through my eyes, or read my mind. And so to me, this seems like a far better state, like attaining “Nirvana” without much effort. It’s funny. Life really is.

If anyone would have guessed, that a hard core emotional and sentimental guy like me would change like this, I would have definitely laughed at him/her at that time. But now, let me see how long this will go… Maybe I can emulate a saint and share some pearls of wisdom when this period is over. Or maybe I am en-route the path of Enlightenment... Who knows ;-)

Jokes apart... I really want to get out of this phase, and be the person I was... This is the testing time, and I will strive to get out successful and victorious... :) Pray for me...

Things I am learning from my boss...

I recently read a blog post that started with a tale of a lousy supervisor doing a truly horrific job of relaying negative feedback to a subordinate. It got me thinking about how some bosses can be so miserable. Not wanting to linger too much in negativity, I tried to conjure up some of the points from the various bosses and managers I see around at my workplace. A good manager is hard to find, but when you have one, you often get to learn valuable lessons.

Here are some things I have learned from my boss.

Maintain a blame-free work environment
Finger-pointing is a highly toxic and counter-productive behaviour, but there is more to it; in a relatively new organization it is essential to move forward at a fast and efficient pace. A no-mistakes pace is simply too slow. To survive, we have to move at a speed that guarantees a certain rate of error. We must accept the fact that mistakes will be made and corrected on the fly, simply because a pace that yields no mistakes will not bring us to takeoff before the end of the runway.
In a typical organization where a culture of “no mistakes” prevails, everything is gold-plated to death. Time is regularly wasted on unnecessarily perfect performances, and on cover-ups when things didn’t go according to plan.
“No blame” does not mean “no accountability”. My boss has clearly spelt out, “It’s OK to make a mistake and you will not be judged for it. Making a mistake and not learning from it is a different story”.

Don’t confuse “urgent” with “important”
You plan your day, week and month. You focus your efforts in a calculated effort to achieve very specific goals. Then someone rushes in screaming that the sky is falling and all progress is put on hold until the oh-so-urgent issue is resolved. There’s a hero’s aura about riding to the rescue and saving the day, but when the day is done, you are still a day (or a week, or a month) behind your schedule. The fires you are putting out may be real, or they may be artificial emergencies conceived to manipulate your priority list. Don’t let the moment’s glory distract you from executing your plan for too long. It may not be as urgent, but it is far more important.

Manage your personal productivity
Productivity is a complicated issue. First off, the disparity between individuals is huge. It is not uncommon for a star performer to be 3-4 times as productive as an average, good employee. On top of that, there are many subjective and even random factors at play; the estimates that we use to measure productivity are always partially subjective.
Improving your personal productivity is a great way to get better at what you do, but as an individual, you are the only one who can tell how productive your day is. You can expect your manager to measure your productivity over time, but when it comes to your day-to-day personal productivity — you’re on your own. You’re the only one who can do it, and you’re the one to benefit from it.

A Fact, hard to accept for me

This is a post which I have taken from my personal blog, and was written on April 17, 2010. almost after an year not, I was finding it too relevant again in my life right now, so thought of bringing it up here.

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There is a fact of life which so far in my life I have encountered quite a few times, and every time I lost something in the process. But even till date, I have not been able to accept this particular actuality, because somewhere at the back of my mind, I hope and pray that ‘it’ is not obvious to happen. And that is why I want to question ‘it’. Whoever reads this, would wonder what the hell I am talking about.

I have many examples to explain, but I am refraining from putting them here. But because of some incidents, a strange feeling has crept inside me, suddenly making me feel that things change. My feeling of loss stems out of such drastic changes concerning my very close friends. It’s a mixed feeling. This happens with a friend of the same sex, as well as the opposite sex. Whatever the case may be, I feel that post marriage, people view friendships in a different light. The losses always begin subtly and impact gradually. But is it necessary?

I am not saying that it is the married/engagement friend who is at fault. Relationships certainly do change after marriage/engagement. While he/she is trying to adjust to the new environment, his/her friends find it difficult to adjust to the new person he/she becomes. Insecurity, protectiveness and missing the old times become very prominent. Everyone needs company, and when the company seems to be drifting apart, it is obvious that a feeling of rejection sets in. And this is especially difficult for people like me whose world revolves only around a few friends, and finds comfort in the company of that friend.

I just get scared because my world is shrinking fast. Most of my close friends would get engaged/married before me, and I would be left all alone. I get anxious whether I should make close friends, leaving an open area to get shattered time and again. I commit myself totally to my friendships, and I give in everything for it. I don’t want my close friendships to get wilted and put myself in the position of saying, “Our friendship was great till it lasted.”

It's nice to be back... :-)

A little over a year and half ago, I started this blog, but back then I knew nothing about blogging. Nor do I know it now. For me, all I knew was that I was about to embark on a new chapter in my life wherein I would be putting down the thoughts coming to my mind.

Over last few months, I have been so occupied with work that hardly got time to write, even though there have been loads of posts queued up in my brain. But these things take forever to write, and now that I’m working, I don’t have forever to write.

So, in the spirit of “Good enough” is the enemy of “At all”, I’m going to start blogging again, but with no blogging schedule.

I’m writing because I want to – when I want to. I know from personal experience that I most like to write when I’m unhappy because when I’m unhappy I withdraw from the world and the last thing I want to do is to keep all that stuff confined to my mind, that’s making me unhappy. But that doesn’t mean I will not be delighted to share all the good things happening.

My only motive is to write. I don’t care how many readers there are – it is simply an outlet for my thoughts. It’s nice to be back :-)

In Shadows...

I have a realization that I may have to stop writing for a while. I think I could be upsetting people. Thought what I write seems to be philosophical, they are all inspired from my experiences in life. But I've been downright nasty with some of my posts, raising fingers directly or indirectly. I'm probably showing up the more thoughtful, horrible side of my nature and giving people all the reason they need to stop talking to me.

It's been an odd week so far, damn hectic and stressed out. It feels pathetic when you cannot talk to your close ones for an elongated period. Many of the fears about the frenzied work life that would accompany with my new job profile have actually come true. A few posts earlier I wrote about experiential learning, and exposure. Now, given how strenuous it can be, I fail to find time for myself, and end up frustrated.

Unintentionally, one day, through my wrath and hateful words, I will push away everybody those matter to me. Then I'll be alone and will be forced to surrender. This thing, this confinement to a shell, rules my life, and haunts me at times. It subtly tells me that the worst is inevitable and that the only way to avoid all the pain is to just give up. But I don't want to let it win. I want to make my success plausible.

The part of me that exists without shadow looks only for a bright future. Sadly the clouds are gathering and everything remains in shade. But soon I will return with my positive self, tearing apart the clouds of dejection, cheerful and progressive as always.

The Binding Energy of a Relationship – TRUST...

By its name, a relationship defines what it is, the ability of two or more people to relate to each other.

In order to relate to another entity, you have to trust them and be able to communicate with them. This doesn’t apply only to romantic relationships, which strangely is often the terms in which people think of a relationship, but also to family members and friends.

Trust, is the phenomenal word that gives a true shape to our life. It is the most valuable gift that we can offer to anyone. Have you trusted anyone blindly, or believed in blind faith? If no, then you have missed the essence of life. "Trust" is that simple element that forms the gist of all true relationships, and gives the sheer joy of Life.

And trust is a mutual affair. Everyone loves to trust, likewise everyone likes to be trusted too. Trust gives joy both to the one who trusts as well as to the entrusted. But why do we feel happy or contented when we are trusted? Is it a sense of achievement or accomplishment? No! It’s not! We feel happy when we are trusted blindly because we feel that our care and affection has been recognized. We are assured of the fact that our care is accounted for and is equally respected by the one who enjoys the care.

Relationships sans trust are just like sugar-free cakes. Trust is that fragile thread that strongly binds people together. There exist relationships in life that have no speck of trust, still they exist vaguely, but eventually end up in no sweet memory and no feel of attachment. This is what happens to relationships that lack trust. Such relationships can better be referred to as acquaintances. Most of the times when we are in a new surrounding, we will be longing for trust and friendship. Initially we will be allured towards people who superficially seem to share characteristics and wishes much similar to us. We gradually get along well. Then with the passage of time, we start feeling that inspite of spending a long time, there is no emotional attachment and neither is there any strong bond with them. This is because this new relationship was based on similarities and not on trust. So, relationships that lack the principle ingredient of trust are just transient.

Nevertheless, the critical point is that Trust, once been broken, there's a chance it may never be fully repaired. You might be able to achieve a degree of trust again, but the cracks from the break will always be there, and it will take far less to not only break, but completely shatter trust a second time.

So, if you want a happy life and a happy relationship, trust in trusting your loved ones. The same can be very well extended to business relationships, wherein when meeting your clients you need to convey a sense of professionalism and trust. You certainly don't want to come across as a "untrustworthy scumbag with a big sales pitch".

With someone entrusting you at all crossroads of life, you would really feel the difference.

Football Fever on the rise..Would the injuries spoil the party?

"Oh! Why is tomorrow? Why not today?" appears every time in our mind, especially while waiting for pleasure. It is always a heart beating feelings when it is a matter of counting down.


With the 2010 FIFA World Cup about to take-off, the excitement level is really high. ESPN Star Sports is all set for a higher TRP for the thrilling encounters. People are changing their travelling schedules, re-considering their plans so that nothing comes between them and soccer.


Like all football lovers, I have been waiting for these matches with bated breath, keeping my fingers crossed for my favourites.

Off-late, many star players have been either knocked out of the tournament or been considered doubtful owing to injuries. The question arises that would this be a big blow to the grand showdown? The sudden attack of injury demon to some of the favourite teams has hurt the enthusiasm with which the fans have been anticipating one of the world's biggest sporting events. Likes of Michael Ballack, Rio Ferdinand and Nani would be missing the entire tournament, while the skills of Andrea Pirlo, Didier Drogba and Arjen Robben would be unavailable at least for the initial games.

But nevertheless, the football fanatics are all geared up to witness the great battle which has been widely talked of - Christiano Ronaldo vs Lionel Messi. The predictions for who would emerge as the Champions has already become a war. The football fraternity (including me) is planning the big nights already. Are you one of them?

Amidst the chaos in Life...

A mail I received recently, so very well explains what should drive our life.
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A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life.

Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some
expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to hot coffee.

When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the professor said: "If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is but normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the best cups and were eyeing each other's cups.

Now if life is coffee, then the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain Life, but the quality of Life doesn't change. Some times, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee in it."

Don't let the cups drive you... Enjoy the coffee instead... :)

Agony of patients..Doctors need to know this...

It’s a prevalent and largely true fact that doctors have a pretty tough life, with their duty calling at any time of the day. Very often we see articles written about Doctors’ plight, about how patients’ senseless questions haunt them, about how they have to compromise with their personal lives, etc.

But I am writing about the other side of Doctors, which says about the frustration and agony that one experiences on visiting doctors. This is on the basis of what I noticed and experienced over the last one month, which was full of visits to doctors to get my left toe treated.

There are a lot of complaints against doctors. But unlike customers to any other service industry, patients cannot be impatient, and they cannot bargain with the doctor. Whatever the doctor says, prescribes, is God’s word.

1) Doctors value their own time over the value of patients’ time. No patient likes to arrive on time for an appointment, only to be left waiting for half an hour or longer. This way the patients’ frustrations only grow stronger.

2) Doctors often rush through the appointments, not even listening properly and leaving too little time for a constructive conversation. They cut the patients short when they are speaking, ignore what patients tell, and rely on charts instead of preferred one-to-one communication.

3) Doctors often preemptively mix-up and generalize the patients’ cases with some other previous case histories, and lump them with the generalist prescription only to regret later and correct the mistake.

4) Unnecessary prescriptions, be it for medicines/drugs or laboratory tests, is what most doctors give. For them, it is a means of showing how learned they are. But another reason is that most doctors are entrapped in a vicious circle of gifts and inducements. (Thankfully, the law has now started prohibiting such transactions between doctors and other related medical/pharmacy agencies.) But eventually it hits mostly at the pockets of the patients, instead of the disease or ailment.

This all at times makes me question, that what is it that Doctors don’t know? And the immediate answer which comes to me is ‘Almost Everything’. It is high time they realise this.

Painful one month...

I recently got my left toe operated again for some infection and nail deformation. Possibly because of tight shoes while playing football, the nail of my left toe got deformed and it started penetrating the skin creating a pus, and developing a huge swelling. This started in October 2009, and I first got it operated in Mumbai in November. All was good for a few months, but the problem re-appeared, and this time it was more severe, with the skin flesh getting infected and unbearable pain. So had to again visit the doctors.

This post describes the pains of last one month (not only the physical pain of the wound, but the mental stress on visiting the doctors).
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May 1, 2010 (Visiting a doctor in Indore): The appointment was for 5.30 PM, and I reached there at 5.20 PM. I and Dad sat in the waiting area, and the time started. Half an hour passed, and we called the doctor, who said he is on his way, and would be reaching in 5 minutes. The clock was still running. Probably his watch was running a little slow. He eventually arrived at 6.30 PM; checked the swelling of my toe in 2 minutes; concluded that it would have to be operated, but he can’t do it that week. WOW!! I spent an hour to hear this, when I was leaving for Pune the next day. He gave me some painkillers and ointments to keep me going till I could return and get it operated.

On reaching Pune, i got busy with work, and so thought that better to see a doctor there and get the problem resolved there itself.

May 10, 2010 (Visiting a doctor in Pune): My cousin took an appointment with the doctor for 6 PM, for which I left office early, and reached the clinic on time. Like the previous time, the time flew. The doctor came in late, and his assistant gave the shock that the doctor would not see patients on the basis of appointment, but on the basis of who came when, and what is the level of urgency. (Now who decides that, I have no clue.) My turn came at 8 PM. I told the doctor the entire history of the wound, the earlier operation and what the doctor in Indore had suggested. But he said that there is no need for a surgery. Just take the medicines (a pretty heavy dose, and damn expensive medicines), do the dressings and I would be alright in a week.

I followed what the doctor prescribed. The pain was lesser (because of the effect of the painkillers), but the wound was getting bad.

May 17, 2010 (Follow up with the same doctor in Pune): This time I knew I should get as early as possible and be in the FIFO line. Thankfully, this time I had to wait only for one and half hour as compared to two hours last time. When I told the doctor, that the pain is a little less because of the medicines, but otherwise it isn’t much better, he had a look at my toe that why am I saying that, because according to him it was good. I asked him to turn on some more lights and look better, pointing to the infected area on my toe. His next reaction was, “Oh! I did not notice that pus getting created. It has to be operated.” What the *@#$. Did not notice? Is he a doctor or just a chemist writing medicines? I kept my cool, and asked him when he could operate. He told me Friday, and gave me a long list of tests to be conducted (as if it was some major operation I was undergoing, with tests like Australia antigen, HIV, Urea, etc.)

I was already thinking whether to get these tests done or not, that the doctor gave the final punch saying that the operation would have to be early morning, and he can’t wait for my parents to arrive. And it was over for me. I went back to Indore that weekend, to get the toe operated (from the same doctor whom I had visited earlier).

May 21, 2010 (Operation Day): In the morning, straight from the bus stand, I went to the hospital, and into the Operation Theater. The docs gave me a full anesthesia (thankful to them for this), and I did not even know how time went by and the operation was done. After a few hours, I was allowed to go home, but advised not to walk or put any load on the foot because the stitches might break. I had to come back the next day to get the dressing changed.

May 22, 2010 (Visiting the doctor for change of dressing): As usual, the time given was for 6.30 PM, and the doctor did not come till 7 PM. Till now, I had no clue what all was done to my toe. But when the dressing was opening, I literally felt nauseating. Half the nail taken out from the root, the skin cut on the sides and 3-4 stitches to wrap it back. Gosh. To add to it, the gush of the pain from the toe to the entire body when the pressure was released on taking out the dressing, sent me into a black-out and I fainted. The doctor then asked me to lie down for some time, and changed the dressing.

Now that the operation is done, I am still feeling the pain. I can't keep my foot hanging or put much load on it for at least one more week, and then I have to get the stitches cut.

The pain was before, the pain is still there. Soon it will subside. But the entire month has been such, that I can never forget this painful one month which also made me realize what pains others go through. Experience is the best teacher, for knowledge as well as empathy.

The changed face of friendship...

I am not a fragile character, and do not get the paranoid feeling that people are talking about me and laughing behind my back. But still I feel like writing this post because I value true friendship a lot.
Friendship can be a wonderful relationship that serves to support, encourage, and entertain. But It’s unfortunate, but some friends tend to take more than give and might need to be cut out of your life.
This is going to be an honest, at-your-face kind of post. I will say what I want to and I don’t care what others would think because barring a few people, I don’t care anything about anyone. I don’t want to indulge in humiliation and become what I don’t want to, so will avoid taking any names directly.

It must be pretty clear that what I am getting towards is describing what two-faced friends are. The friend who says one thing and does something else or the friend who is nice to your face and then talks badly about you behind your back is a two-faced friend.
In front of you they act all sweet normal and nice but behind your back they are the exact opposite making fun of you, spilling your secrets and talking bad about you. They usually do that if they are jealous, to get attention, be more popular, and they are millions of other reasons but it depends on the person. And at times their actions tend to be more severe than the typical casual gossip common among friends; their actions are purposeful, hurtful, and continue regardless of your objections.

Making fun or jokingly pulling leg directly is something different and can be easily understood. But if it becomes a third-person talk, the gravity and seriousness of the issue increases.

Another variety of such species include those selfish people who show that they share everything and would be together to travel light years with you, but who won’t tell what they are doing so as to remain ahead of you. Befriending others for personal gain has become a common phenomenon.

When you have your true friends around you, you might not be able to identify any of such backstabbers amidst them. But it is better that as soon as the realization comes, such friends need to be dumped, because they aren't your real friends just someone who will use you to do or get something for their benefit.

To sum it up, I am quoting a poem after modifying it suitably…

When you didn’t speak to my face,
And went behind my back,
I stood shocked in anguish,
When I came to know what you quack.

I never thought you'd be,
So mean, so cruel, so rude.
But since this you have showed me,
That this is the true you, so shrewd.

You lied to my face,
And talked behind my back.
You thought I would not trace,
That it has been you, the one to attack.

You will now have to see,
That this is the end.
Stay rest assured I would not wail,
Over such long lost friend.

It is time to say goodbye,
And I don't want it to end,
But I cannot take another lie,
From a lying two-faced friend.

Three of the best stories...

We learn a lot through our experiences in life. The following three stories I came across, do teach some lesson. It is worth pondering over them.
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The Turtles

A turtle family decided to go on a picnic. The turtles, being naturally slow about things, took seven years to prepare for their outing. Finally the turtle family left home looking for a suitable place. During the second year of their journey they found a place ideal for them at last!

For about six months they cleaned the area, unpacked the picnic basket, and completed the arrangements. Then they discovered they had forgotten the salt. A picnic without salt would be a disaster, they all agreed. After a lengthy discussion, the youngest turtle was chosen to retrieve the salt from home. Although he was the fastest of the slow moving turtles, the little turtle whined, cried, and wobbled in his shell. He agreed to go on one condition: that no one would eat until he returned. The family consented and the little turtle left.

Three years passed and the little turtle had not returned. Five years...six years... then on the seventh year of his absence, the oldest turtle could no longer contain his hunger. He announced that he was going to eat and begun to unwrap a sandwich. At that point the little turtle suddenly popped out from behind a tree shouting, 'See! I knew you wouldn't wait. Now I am not going to go get the salt.'

[Some of us waste our time waiting for people to live up to our expectations. We are so concerned about what others are doing that we do not do anything ourselves.]
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The Frogs

A farmer came into town and asked the owner of a restaurant if he could use a million frog legs. The restaurant owner was shocked and asked the man where he could get so many frog legs! The farmer replied, 'There is a pond near my house that is full of frogs - millions of them. They all croak all night long and they are about to make me crazy!' So the restaurant owner and the farmer made an agreement that the farmer would deliver frogs to the restaurant, five hundred at a time for the next several weeks.

The first week, the farmer returned to the restaurant looking rather sheepish, with two scrawny little frogs. The restaurant owner said, 'Well... where are all the frogs?' The farmer said, 'I was mistaken. There were only these two frogs in the pond. But they sure were making a lot of noise!'

[Next time you hear somebody criticizing or making fun of you, remember, it's probably just a couple of noisy frogs. Also remember that problems always seem bigger in the dark. Have you ever laid in your bed at night worrying about things which seem almost overwhelming like a million frogs croaking? Chances are pretty good that when the morning comes, and you take a closer look, you'll wonder what all the fuss was about.]
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The Pretty Lady

Once upon a time a big monk and a little monk were traveling together. They came to the bank of a river and found the bridge was damaged. They had to wade across the river. There was a pretty lady who was stuck at the damaged bridge and couldn't cross the river. The big monk offered to carry her across the river on his back. The lady accepted. The little monk was shocked by the move of the big monk. 'How can big brother carry a lady when we are supposed to avoid all intimacy with females?' thought the little monk. But he kept quiet... The big monk carried the lady across the river and the small monk followed unhappily. When they crossed the river, the big monk let the lady down and they parted ways with her. All along the way for several miles, the little monk was very unhappy with the act of the big monk. He was making up all kinds of accusations about big monk in his head. This got him madder and madder. But he still kept quiet. And the big monk had no inclination to explain his situation. Finally, at a rest point many hours later, the little monk could not stand it any further, he burst out angrily at the big monk. 'How can you claim yourself a devout monk, when you seize the first opportunity to touch a female, especially when she is very pretty? All your teachings to me make you a big hypocrite The big monk looked surprised and said, 'I had put down the pretty lady at the river bank many hours ago, how come you are still carrying her along?'

[This very old Chinese Zen story reflects the thinking of many people today. We encounter many unpleasant things in our life, they irritate us and they make us angry. Sometimes, they cause us a lot of hurt, sometimes they cause us to be bitter or jealous .. But like the little monk, we are not willing to let them go away.We keep on carrying the baggage of the 'pretty lady' with us. We let them keep on coming back to hurt us, make us angry, make us bitter and cause us a lot of agony. Why? Simply because we are not willing to put down or let go of the baggage of the 'pretty lady'. We should let go of the pretty lady immediately after crossing the river. This will immediately remove all our agonies. There is no need to be further hurt by the unpleasant event after it is over.]

Lost myself..Clueless to write...

It’s been a while that my blog featured any updates. Not feeling like writing for quite some time.

Though I do fritter away a lot of time watching all the movies, but I am definitely not wasting my times writing their reviews. This is one of the very good excuses I have of not writing.

The truth is that I had no intention of abandoning my blog for so long. But I am clueless as in what to write. There is no motivation left that made me put my thoughts well into words. For a while I felt that the longer I stay away, easier it would be for me to have something to write. But all in vain. So just for the sake of trying to jot down something, I thought describing my situation is the best thing to do. Probably it is going to aid in venting out the stress a little.

I am feeling lost since many weeks. And it has been so deeper that now I am getting the remorse of it, and how helpless I am on it. I don’t even know how to tell it to near and dear ones. I don’t know how they would react on it...even if I tell it anyhow.

But certainly it’s like a unlit night for my consciousness!

How did it happen? Where did I go?

I shrouded myself. I thought I had all I ever wanted, so my desire for anything else went astray. In my smugness and complacency, I lost everything...and then I woke up...much too late to undo what had been already done. I forgot how to be myself.

It is just at times that I remember to remember me. I believe, am passing through the darkest part of it. Hoping the dawn’s advent is not so long. It’s a killing and painful experience.

Pleasing everyone, is a task that cannot be done...

I know and live this statement so very well indeed. When you try pleasing everybody, you usually end up pleasing nobody at all including yourself. Oh well, everything in good time.
What I feel like and what I would actually do is two totally different things. It just isn't in me to run. Part of my problem I guess, I have to face it full head-on.

A serious problem with trying to please everyone is that you might be forced to abandon you ideals. Stooping down, as it were, from the bar you’ve raised for yourself just to make someone else happy will only makes you unhappy. In other words, there will always be a price to pay when trying to please everyone.

I just wish I could somehow solve all the problems and conflicts that I am encountering. Furthermore, solve all these with the least amount of trouble and pain and hurt if preferable. Many at times I feel like running away, but that isn't even an option anymore. It never was I guess.

I realised that if my best isn’t good enough for some people, bluntly speaking: that’s their problem. I can’t punish myself for that. I have decided not to waste more time and energy (because I have none to spare) in feeling bad because I can’t make everyone happy. Coming to terms, accepting things as they really are, actually helps. I just had to let go of the wishful thinking.

I’ll be happy with this truth:
Although I can’t please everyone, I can always please SOMEONE.

Is it the beginning to complete bifurcation of the country???

It is a sad time for India, going down a very bad path. As we keep dividing the country along state lines, I remember only one lesson from Indian history: be wary of "divide & conquer". Either its riots, divisions of states, complications like agitations against non-“Marathi Manoos” in Maharashtra or political controversies; India seems to be creating hurdles for its own development and progress.

And now, the oversimplification of the Telangana issue is ridiculous. It is wrong to divide the country on the basis of language, religion, or dominance of some caste. Division should have been purely on the administrative grounds.

Granting of Telangana is no solution, whereas it will be the root cause for developing fissiparous tendencies all over the country by interested political groups. If political parties do have political will, they must discuss this issue threadbare to assess the pros and cons dispassionately and then only move forward. And when there is a clear divide between the various political parties over the issue, such a big decision cannot be taken stand alone. The only persons to benefit from division are those who will become, ministers, chief minister DG police, & Chief Secretary & head of other departments. Rest everybody will be loser.

One must agree that the deprivation of opportunity and development cause separatism than any other reasons. If a geography is constantly ignored for whatever reason, then a revolt is bound to happen. But dividing into separate state is not the solution for underdevelopment. The whole world is worried about economy, climate, jobs, infrastructure, technology and future prospects; and look at us we are worried about forming a separate state. Instead, let’s try to fight the underdevelopment, get rid of the naxalites and create a healthy environment.

Some argue that what are the grounds on which we created Jharkhand, Uttaranchal and Chhattisgarh, that Telangana doesn’t satisfy. But if we go by the same logic, after creation of Telangana, what are the grounds that we can deny separate states for Vidarbha, Gorkhaland, Bundelkhand or Coorg to be created? Their protests and agitations have also become.

And suppose, we still succumb to this demand and Hyderabad will go to Telangana. The question remains that why all the development in Andhra Pradesh should be taken straight away by the new state? What would be left in the remaining AP? Everyone has been immersed in developing Hyderabad, that most other cities seriously lack the resources.

Though the Constitution created the federal-like set up with three layer governments, in reality, the bottom layer - so called "Panchayat Raj" - has already vanished purely because of corrupt political atmosphere in the country. It means people lost voices in their own administration, despite India technically called a democratic nation! But is fasting, protesting and demonstrations a way to get things done in a democracy? The sovereignty and unity of the nation is at stake.

Thinking about it, my family and relatives agree that my house should be a separate state and I don't understand why the Govt. of India should object to this genuine demand. In fact, our neighbour works hard and earns more, which is something we cannot bear. I want my house to be made a separate state and the government should send me funds for development directly; if not, I will retaliate.

All I can say is that any decision taken in a hurry in such a scenario, by accepting the demand for a separate state, will give rise to a sever crisis and confrontation against the Law and Order of the country. It will set a bad example for the youth, to take the reins of violent protest to get the demands met.

Is the breakdown of our national unity nearing?